On the topic of sexualization of early childhood – my reaction
is yes – it does happen way too soon! I have talked about this for several
years (before I had children and even more now that I do have children of my
own). It is very disturbing to see what
children are willing to do at such young ages – and then to think about when (age)
I actually learned about some of the topics/behaviors. I am 32 years old – so I
don’t feel like I am that out of touch!
1) Just this past school year, I was bent over helping a
student. A feel student of mine walked
up behind me and “smacked” my bottom quite hard. Stunned I shot up expecting to see a young
boy and much to my surprise, one of my sweetest little girls! When I overcame
my initial shock, I asked my little girl, why she would do that? Her response
was, “That is what my dad does to my mom when she bends over!” I didn’t
discipline her for this action but did speak with her privately that it’s not
really appropriate to touch someone’s backside like that at school. I did say,
if that is a fun game you play at home, ok! I also spoke with her mom about it
and she apologized but did say they are very playful in the home with things
like that and the girls think it’s funny to catch someone bent over… Although this behavior is overly offensive, I
think that it gives this young girl and her siblings, ideas that slapping is
fun and playful in a sexual way – even though she thought the behavior was
funny. She could internalize this as I
like someone and the way to let them know is to slap them. “They learn that sex is the defining activity
in relationships, to the exclusion of love and friendship. They learn that sex
is often linked to violence” (Levin & Kilbourne , 2009).
2) Children that doll play sometimes do some strange
things. This past year, I also had a student
who used our classroom puppets to make kissing noises and had the puppets
pretending to kiss each other. Kissing
in preschool was shocking to me. I decided to sit in on this play and see what
I could learn from it and her. I tried
redirecting the play by asking her puppets to play with me and each time she
refused, reverting back to the kissing.
Later in the day, I asked the child, when we were playing puppets
earlier, what made you decide that they should kiss. Her response was that is
what boys and girls do. This was a new
behavior for this child and highly concerning for me because during the school
year, she went from one foster home, transferred to another foster home, and
then released back to the care of her mother.
Because the behavior was new, it was frightening to me, wondering which
environment triggered this behavior and was she witnessing age appropriate
sexual behavior at home? The other implication I have for this behavior with
this child, is that if someone did abuse her, would she know and understand
that this behavior is not appropriate? She very much thought that is how you
show someone you like them. I fear for her being taken advantage of.
3)Lastly, I notice the over sexualization of children in the
clothing that they wear or what is available or trendy in stores or what is
seen out and about. Little girls shorts
are SHORT. Tanks and dresses are tight and revealing. Little girls can buy shoes with heels on
them. Boys clothing is becoming very “fitted”.
Shorts and shirts are a tighter fit and reveal more of the male body also. Tween girls wear things I would never have
been let out of the house wearing. It is often hard to find adult clothes that
I feel are appropriate as a mother, teacher, and ones I feel comfortable
in! Implications of sexualizing the way
children dress – are obvious. Children are exploring with sex at younger and
younger ages. Children are also
internalizing what is appropriate based on what is trendy and available to
them. If a parent were to make their child
wear clothing that weren’t as revealing as some, a child would most likely be
made fun of for the choice. Children and
tweens need to be shown more of this http://www.ted.com/talks/cameron_russell_looks_aren_t_everything_believe_me_i_m_a_model?utm_campaign=&awesm=on.ted.com_CameronRussell&utm_content=awesm-publisher&utm_source=l.facebook.com&utm_medium=on.ted.com-static
and less of what we see each day.
My awareness of the sexualization of things and children in
early childhood has been heightened this week.
I have been aware for a while, but I feel more empowered to address
behaviors and issues as they arrive and definitely do not ignore them. Creating conversation about them with parents
will open their eyes too. Many of the
families I work with are younger parents and I don’t know if they know when
things are not ok.
Levin, D. E., & Kilbourne, J. (2009). [Introduction]. So
sexy so soon: The new sexualized childhood and what parents can do to protect
their kids (pp. 1-8). New York: Ballantine Books. Retrieved from: http://dianeelevin.com/sosexysosoon/introduction.pdf
Danielle,
ReplyDeleteI don't have children yet, but I feel like when I do I want to keep them little for as long as I can. I feel that in today's society it is hard to do that. With media and technology children know way more now than what they should. I will go places with my Husband and see how these young girls are dressing and think I never dresses like that, my mother would have flipped. I have a sister who is 13 years old and it makes me so happy to hear her talk about things, she is still so young at heart and thats rare to find these days. She still would rather watch the Disney channel than hang out with the boys and her clothes are very tasteful. She got a lot of my traits growing up and I feel very proud to have been an influence on her. I just hope that when I have children I can raise them and protect them the way I feel that I've protected me sister from the sexual world that is our culture today.